Doug Donnan
Creator and the
Catalyst Global/Staff Reviewer
goodtimesnewsweekly
ISSUE #20
GTNW!
GOOD TIMES NEWS
WEEKLY (GTNW):
THE GOOD TIMES
NEWS WEEKLY (GTNW): POEMS, QUIZLERS', SCRABBLE-[A][I][D][S],
'THOUGHT(S) FOR
THE DAY', 'QUOTE(S) OF THE DAY', 'THE EDGE OF ESPANOL', 'WHATSIS'?,
'DOUG'S PERSONAL
CONFUSION SAYS' 'SPELL CHECKERS', &
MUCH MORE!
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Executive Editor:
Doug Donnan (C&CG Staff Reviewer)
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CONTENTS:
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GTNW POETRY
SECTION:
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"The Hell Ya'
Say"
by
Doug Donnan
Ya'll sure are
frettin' them dreaded fires o' hell,
Ya'll know ol'
Hob's down there... only too well.
Ya'll are thinkin'
he's a waitin' fer' you by n' by,
Ya'll wanna' avoid
him?... here's sumthin' to try.
Ya'll need to take
Jesus Christ in heart n' soul,
Ya'll do so this
instant... jist' make it yer' goal.
Ya'll had better
trust me on this n' do not delay,
Cuz' ifn' ya' do
ya' might have... all hell to pay!
___ Praise Jesus!
___
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"The
Hangman"
by
Doug Donnan
He stirs you at
sunrise no compassion has he,
opens the cell
door... he ain't settin' you free.
He walks you out
of that ol' jailhouse by n' by,
up them ol' gallows
steps... it's yer time to die.
He pulls a black
hood way down over yer head,
a dark message...
you'll be hangin' there dead.
He pulls back the
lever to release the trap door,
gravity comes
by... n' you fall through the floor.
He slowly steps
over to inspect how he's done,
then looks into
the crowd... then up at the sun.
He's the hangman
no one knows his real name,
but he draws a
large crowd n' a chokin' noose...
These his only two
'undisputed' claims to fame.
___ The End ___
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*Reader
participation:
Write a funny joke
and/or experience you've had and share it with
us here at the
GTNW!
If anyone would
like to help out with 'The GTNW'
just drop me a
line! (so to speak) Doug/Editor
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Color of the Day:
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Spanish 'Ole' Red'
Doug's Personal
'Confusion Says':
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Confusion says:
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Worm Holes:
============
'A female who
fishes with no bait... is not necessarily a hooker.'
'If you ever open
a can of worms... be careful of swooping birds.'
'A tardy sleeping
worm... decreases its chances of being caught.'
'The Council of
Worms... wasn't a river fisherman's convention.'
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Thought(s) for the
Day:
====================
'A crippled man
can only dream of being a somnambulist.' (Doug)
'If you snore,
sooner or later, you will be sleeping alone.' (Doug)
'It's alright to
cry when you walk through an onion field.' (Doug)
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Quote(s) of the
Day:
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Awards of the
State:
=================
"Go for the
Gold!" (Anonymous)
"Hi-Ho
Silver!" (The Lone Ranger)
"Bronze is
for Statues!" (Doug)
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Anagrams,
Quizlers, & Much More!!!
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Anagram(s) of the
Day:
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> Unscramble
this word and feel like a winner!: OELALBWRP
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Puzzlers &
Quizlers of the Day:
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'SPELL CHECKERS':
Which of these words is misspelled?: 'Dolldrums' /// 'Clandestine' /// 'Paraplegic'
'Whatsis?"
===========
>> 1. Who
was Ithuriel? /// 2. What is a Jack a-nape?
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Scribes. Singers
& Super Stars:
==========================
>>> What
rock group sang: 'American Woman'?
>>>>
Who was the lead actor in the movie: 'Key Largo'?
>>>>>
What is Hulk Hogan's real first name?
>>>>>>
Who sang the song: 'Moon River'?
'SCRABBLE-[A][I][D][S]'
======================
[G][A][I][N][S][A][Y]:
To act against. /// [G][A][L][E][N][A]: A heavy mineral.
[H][O][L][M][I][U][M]:
A rare earth element. /// [K][I][B][I][T][Z][E][R]: A s.pectator.
[M][E][L][E][E]:
Hand to Hand fighting
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'The Edge of
Espanol':
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'Don't worry about
it.': 'No te preocpes por eso.'
'How would I
know?': 'Como puedo saber?'
'What difference
does it make now?': 'Que diferencia hace ahora?'
'Who asked you?':
'Quien te pidio?'
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'The GTNW
Pictureless Toons':
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"Aroused
Suspicions", "Lost Marbles"
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_____
"Aroused Suspicions" _____
'You may get
suspicious if you see your son wearing a [ COKE IS THE REAL THING! ] T-shirt.
'You may get
suspicious if you see a Sasquatch looking down your chimney.'
'You may get
suspicious if you see your wife riding on the back of the trash truck.'***
'You may get
suspicious if you see your parish priest is nailing a crucifix on your front
door.'
'You may get
suspicious if you see a KKK mob with torches in your front yard.'
'You may get
suspicious if you see your teenage son reading Cosmopolitan.'
'You may get
suspicious if you see a Sasquatch running off with your George Foreman Grill
.'***+LOL
'You may get
suspicious if you see a real Yeti running off with your Yeti Cooler.'***
____ End
"Aroused Suspicions" _____
_____ "Lost
Marbles" _____
'You may have lost
your marbles if you try to paint your bike while you're riding it.'
'You may have lost
your marbles if you save your old calenders.'
'You may have lost
your marbles if you drink your coffee out of a Dixie Cup.'
'You may have lost
your marbles if you try to make an echo in your toilet bowl'***+LOL
'You may have lost
your marbles if you try to use your radiator as a xylophone.'
'You may have lost
your marbles if you try to balance your bowl of chicken soup on your head.'
'You may have lost
your marbles if you try to play Solitaire with your eyes closed.'
_____ End
"Lost Marbles" _____
*** Doug's 'Pics'
of the day
***+ Doug's Favs
***+LOL Doug makes
himself laugh!
***++LOL (off the
charts!)
Anagram, Puzzlers
& Quizlers, Spell Checkers, Capital Ideas, etc Answers:
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>
POWERBALL
-SPELL CHECKERS:
'Doldrums'
>> 1. An
angel sent by Gabriel to find Satan. ///
2. A male donkey (ass).
>>> The
Guess Who
>>>>
Humphrey Bogart
>>>>>
Paul
>>>>>>
Andy Williams
... END GTNW...
END GTNW ... END GTNW ... END GTNW...
Adios,
Doug/Executive
Editor
goodtimesnewsweekly
